Monster Jam!

Do you ever find yourself in a funk? Just a generally shitty funk, for no significant reason at all? I did. I was all kinds of shitty funky at the end of last week. Work just felt kind of sucky. Things weren’t going according to plan. I felt disorganized and disheveled. It was just a crappy feeling, and I had a crappy attitude that was bogging my awesomeness down. Everything I did and said was blah. It was the worst. I went home Friday after work and resigned myself to a crappy night of laundry and eating dill pickle chips.

This was a funk that even dill pickle couldn’t cure. We’d have to call in the big guns on this one. The very enormous and loud big guns…

I woke up on Saturday morning and I felt different. Something had changed. That cloud of bullshit that had been following me around since Thursday, it was gone. Hey, and it looks like the weight of the world decided to take the day off too. I felt lighter. Better. Happiness was creeping into my heart again. A little smile tickled my lips. A memory scratched at the back of my brain. Something important. Something fun even, I think. Realization dawning, a spark of excitement…

Yes! Fucking yeah! This is the best day ever!

I’M GOING TO FREAKING MONSTER JAM TONIGHT!!!!!!!!

That’s the ticket. Nothing like some high-octane, tire on dirt-ramp action to make you feel alive! And dammit I felt alive again, for the first time all week. I cart-wheeled my jive turkey ass out of bed and greeted the day with a self-assured flourish. I’m going to fucking Monster Jam tonight, so all you troubles of yesterday can suck it.

Ooo, I just got a tingle. Telling your problems to suck it feels great! I’d been letting them get the better of me, but not today. Not on Monster Jam Saturday.

Joce scored the tickets to Monster Jam from her work. They were amazing seats and they were free. She’s got some sweet hookups for swag at her job. But she only had one extra ticket. So it was either me or D. I practically frothed at the mouth for the opportunity to see the monster trucks in action. It was an easy sacrifice for D. Besides the first hockey game of the season was on Saturday night. He could just grab some beers and buddies and have a great time watching the game at our place.

I met up with Joce and Harry for dinner and pre-drinks. Then we grabbed some roadies (drinks for the trek to the stadium) and hopped on the subway. I’m just going to put this out there, I love how easy it is to drink on the transit in a big city. Nobody gives a shit. I mean if you see a TTC worker, hide your drink. But other than that, ain’t no thang.

As soon as we set foot in the stadium we could hear the trucks. They were insanely loud! Good thing we’d packed earplugs. I was shaking with anticipation, I just knew this was going to totally rock!

The air was so thick with fumes and fuel, it was like breathing in testosterone. It was everything I’d ever imagined a monster truck jam to be and more.

monster jam stadi

My inner geek was also very pleased to see a Batman Monster Truck. That’s like the best possible combination of words ever. Batman Monster Truck. Yeah, you’re gonna want to soak that awesomeness in slowly. You don’t want to bite off more than you can chew and get hysterical. Ah, fuck it. Life is for the living, right?

BATMAN! MONSTER! TRUCK! FULL BLOWN GEEKY HYSTERIA!

batman monster truck

Batman ripped the shit in the qualifier. He had the fastest time to beat. But he wound up coming in second place to Bounty Hunter. He put on a good show though. And we cheered him on every bit of the way. Then he totally shit the bed on the freestyle and fucked up his truck. He barely even freestyled for 20 seconds before he was sent off to the truck graveyard:

batman going to the graveyard

Some of our other favourite trucks of the night were Grave Digger, Northern Nightmare, Metal Mulisha, Rap Attack, and Krazy Train. Watching the races was fun, but the freestyle was crazy! We saw so many awesome jumps and wrecks. It was truly gory, without any actual gore.

This is Grave Digger getting some sick air off the school bus:

grave digger truck

And here he is about to totally mash the CP24 truck and some shitty yellow car:

grave digger jump

He was so totally awesome! He put on a really great show and got the crowd excited.

My favourite wreck of the night had to be Rap Attack. He tried to go over a jump, but just didn’t have the juice to make it all the way. He was standing straight up on his back tires. There was a moment of horror and uncertainty when we didn’t know if he was going to fall forward or come crashing backwards on top of himself. He wasn’t impressing us too much with the freestyle, he didn’t have as good of a run with it as some of the other trucks did. But I got a good video of the wreck:

It was an action-packed night, and it was just what I needed. Thanks for the invite Joce. I owe you guys a round still, don’t let me forget.

drinking at monster jam

Call me if you’re thirsty!

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