And here it is, my friends… My Shitfest Winter Entry! Something the whole family can enjoy. Or maybe not… Maybe just something the perverted patriarch of the family can enjoy, Embrace of the Vampire. Check it out.

Isaacs Picture Conclusions




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Embrace of the Vampire (1995)
This movie is a turd and I can’t even believe that I watched the whole thing. The. Whole. Fucking. Thing. It’s only an hour and a half but it felt like an eternity, I guess that’s what they were going for? I could’ve easily gotten enough material for this Shitfest post from the first twenty minutes alone, but apparently I’ve got too much integrity to cop out like that. Or I’m simply a masochist. Either way, I lose.
This movie’s plot is so fucking stupid that I’m kind of embarrassed to describe it now that you know I watched it all, but anyways…
In the opening scene we see a disgustingly sweet and overdone tryst between two lovers back in the old timey days. Probably the 1700’s or something stupid like that. This guy is obsessed with his perfect virginal…

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4 thoughts on “SHITFEST 2014: WINTER ~ EMBRACE OF THE VAMPIRE (1995)

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